A Psalm Lament

O Lord, I wake before the light,
my thoughts already in the night.
Sleep has fled, my heart’s in pain,
yet You are here to hear my refrain.

Be near to me, Adonai, I pray,
the weight is great, my strength gives way.
Be near to me, stay close and sure,
and I cannot for long endure.

I knelt and called Your holy name,
You answered me, though I felt shame.
Breath returned where death stood fast,
yet sorrow clings and will not pass.

My home was crossed, my peace undone,
my safety broken while I was gone.
I must stand and speak no sound,
when all I want is quiet ground.

My son lives on, yet not made whole,
his mind is but a wandering soul.
I love him, Lord, and still I groan,
mercy costs more than I’ve known.

I speak the truth I fear to say,
I wanted all the pain to fade away.
Search my heart, You know it well,
You hear the prayers I dare not tell.

Give light enough for just one step,
as I walk the road I cannot accept.
Hold what I drop, remain, don’t flee,
be more than faith demands of me.

Be near to me, O Adonai, I pray,
the weight is great, my strength gives way.
Be near to me, stay close and strong,
 I cannot endure this for long.